Networking...MEH!

That is an awful title to a blog post about a person who is exploring life and career issues, but I am going to say that I HATE networking. I always have. It's not that I hate people. I'm the exact opposite. I LOVE people. I love talking to people, or I should say that I can talk to just about anyone about anything. I don't have a fear of people, BUT when I've got to ask them for something that's a whole other topic.

I've often wondered where this all came from. I will say that while I am a prety personable person I also keep to myself a lot. The only child in me can spend hours by myself if necessary. I've also had some pretty crazy experiences growing up where I was pretty isolated in school. You know the show "Gossip Girl." Well, I went to a less over the top version of that place (hey it was the early 90's in NYC...no one dressed like that), except I was the poor minority kid who lived in the outer boroughs with a really strict immigrant mother. There is a clearly not a character like THAT on "Gossip Girl".

Anyway, I don't know if some of my experience there shaped who I am now in how I relate to people. I knew early on that I had to make it there by myself. I wasn't leaving with a gaggle of life-long friends. I was leaving with a diploma from a great high school. The less I felt connected to my classmates the harder I worked to make sure that I got good grades, was involved in school activities and ultimately went on to a good college. I guess I separated my achievement from the need for developing relationships. Why bother if you feel that people are going to reject you anyway?

Through the years, I've been awful about keeping in touch with many people both personally and professionally although if I've known you for years, that means that I REALLY, REALLY like you. :) Unfortunately, that now means that I have a very disjointed network. Having to break out of my anti-networking shell/rut is hard. I hate depending on other people. I hate feeling like I am begging. I hate waiting for someone to e-mail or call me back. It sucks. That being said, networking is a major part of this transition for me. I won't be able to learn more about what it's like to be Oprah or a real estate developer or much of anything else without meeting new people. Time to woman up. More importantly, it's time to teach myself that I can't survive, move forward or succeed without people.

Anyway, I would love to hear from people who have gotten to be better networkers over the years. If you've got any advice, please let me know.