Lately I've Been Feeling Like Lloyd Dobler

I love this scene from Say Anything.

I definitely know what I DON'T want to do. I agree with Lloyd that I don't want to sell anything though. :)

What's hard is that right now I really have no idea what to do. Yes, I just wrote that. My consulting gig is at a crossroads. Do I work more for next to nothing? Do I want to do more for an entity that I am not sure that I want to be in the long term?

I've added something new to my life, which is taking a continuing ed class in the hopes that it will push me further into what I'd like to do.

Networking sadly still is not very fun, but I have started to ramp up again.

Part of me is trying to not get totally done. What was once slight sadness is turning into me being a tad incredulous. If I can't get a job (not like I am a super star or anything), then I can only imagine what others will less skills, experience or education are dealing with right now. I wonder sometimes if it's me or the economy or something completely different.

Anyway, I am still trudging along. I guess my version of Lloyd's kickboxing is blogging. :)

Howdy from a Somewhat Busy Thirty-Something Nothing!

Hey, all!

It's December! Can you believe it? I know that I have been delinquent in my updates lately. Between my other blog, personal projects and consulting work (and life!), I've become quite busy. Err?! It was pretty funny for a couple of weeks because I wasn't used to having so many demands on my time.

How are the holidays going for you so far? Are you thinking about making new moves career-wise and personally for 2011?

See you all before the New Year!

I Have Too Much Time on My Hands?

Actually, it's the exact opposite!! I am all of a sudden kinda busy! Sorta...

Happy Weekend!!

Just Checking In TSN Style

Hey, all!

I am checking in via vlog this time. I haven't done one in awhile. I miss them.

I'm having a very productive and rainy Wednesday here in NYC. I hope all is well in our neck of the woods.

Here's a preview of what's in the vlog:

1. Do you know WHY you procrastinate? Take some time and think about the reasons why you may put off important projects or tasks?

2. Does the manner in which a prospective employer treats you during the hiring process a red flag? (I think this has come up before, right?)

3. Entrepreneurship - do I REALLY want to do it?

Enjoy and "talk" to you all soon!!

My Girl Monica

I am sure you all think that I have been doing this process of career exploration completely and totally by myself because I'm clearly doing this super well. Nope!

I actually do have some help. I've been working with a career transition coach named Monica. Could I do this whole career change/exploration process by myself? Yes. maybe. Do I want to? Not really. As I have mentioned before this can sometimes be a lonely process both because I spend a lot of my time alone but also because I don't know that many people who have done what I'm doing.

Monica was a practicing lawyer before she made the transition to being a coach. She's gone through pretty much everything that I am now and that makes her a great support system for me. She has no preconceived notions of what she thinks I should do, and she encourages me to step out and do things that are scary to me and always call me out on my stuff when I need to hear that too. It's nice having a neutral sounding board for a lot of things.

Of course the only issue with this wonderful relationship is that I have to pay for it. Monica ain't cheap. It will also eventually come to an end. Either way, I've appreciated her help.

Thanks, Monica.

Yo!

Yep. I've been a bad girl. I've had some good reasons (at least I think they are good reasons). Check out the video, and you'll know why!

See I'm not that bad!

More to come....

Why I Love Europeans

While I was stumping through the career blogosphere, I came across my favorite new Euro import idea:

(source)

Well the book isn't European, but the concept is.

Ummm...love you, Eueopeans! You give us cool things like French bread, Belgian beer, Spanish tapas, Italian gelato and CAREER BREAKS! By the way, I am fully aware that I just only menitoned food. Never blog when hungry!

So what is a career break? It can be anything from a "gap year for adults" (in the UK especially, post-high school teens will take a year to travel, volunteer or both after graduating from high school. That sounds dang fabulous too!). It's a time to travel; learn a new skill or hobby; return to school for more training or educational opportunities; or figuring out what you'd like to do next career-wise. Sound familiar?

Look, I recognize that I live in a country where four weeks of vacation is considered a luxury, but I truly hope this catches on here in the Good 'Ol U.S.A. As a matter of fact, we tend to shun gaps in a resume and often have to have an explanation at the ready for a prospective employer as to why we haven't lived in our offices or cubicles in months. There seems to be a stigma attached to stepping back and taking stock of our personal and professional lives.

While I love our go-g0 work culture, I think this attitude can be a disservice to workers.

If anything I wish we could change the culture of work in our country in order to make space for personal and professional growth. Maybe we would have less unfulfilled people like me having to search for their next gig. Hmmmm.....

Here are some great career break resources:

The Career Break Site

Career Break Cafe

Career Break Resources (international focus)

Briefcase to Backpack

While some of these have an travel abroad focus and are not really about career transition, I think they are still worth a look.

Have you considered a career break? What would it look like?

"So What Do You Do All Day?"

Since I've started this process, I get that question a lot. A whole lot.

One of the hardest things about my transition so far has been figuring out how to structure my time. There are so many things that I'd like to do or need to do, and it's amazing how the days really do fly by. I figure time must move quickly because I am somewhat relaxed and to some degree maybe remotely enjoying myself? Pssshhh..NOT!

If anything I FEEL like I should be fitting EVERYTHING into my day. Like what? Well....

1. I should be making gourmet meals every night - That can be hard because Jim is never really home, and it's really just me. I did make a slammin' Chickpea and Tomato Risotto last night and Jim was actually home to eat it so that should count for something.

2. I should be blogging A WHOLE LOT MORE - Sorry for the self-flagellation, but I have not been doing such a great job keeping up with multiple blog obligations. I think I feel a lot of pressure to make sure that this is blog is good. I'd rather give you my best than nothing at all, but it seems that I'm getting too good at giving you nothing at all. *Hangs head in shame*

3. My home should be sparkling clean - I should be doing a whole bunch of chores and home projects that I have been holding off on but have not followed through like cleaning baseboards and sifting through old magazines and bills. Sounds fun, doesn't it?

4. Indulging in hobbies - Apparently, I am supposed to actually be enjoying my "time off." Right now in January, it's way too cold to enjoy much of anything, but I know that I need to at least find a way to fit in the things that I didn't do while I was traveling like a mad person. Some people have told me that I should go on a vacation. Ha! I wish!

What do I actually do everyday?

1. I spend time in prayer and reflection - I have not done a very good job this week, but I think this should be an integral part of my day. If my mind ain't right, this process will not be easy.

2. I read career related books - I've only gotten through What Color is Your Parachute? 2010 in its entirety, but I am also reading The Unhappy Lawyer in case you're wondering.

3. I contact people to meet with/talk to about what they do - setting up the "informational interview"....need I say more?

4. I talk to people who do things that I am interested in or think I may be interested in - This is usually anything from a phone call like the one I had this morning to a lunch meeting I had last week. One was with someone I've known in a professional setting. Another was with someone that I've never met, a friend of a friend. One was about real estate development, and the other was about political consulting, advocacy and media relations. Many times my conversations spark ideas about things and make me want to learn more about a particular type of job, person or organization, which leads me to ....

5. RESEARCH and more research - Perhaps it's an excuse to spend my days on the internet, but researching takes up quite a bit of time. I've already taken a look at jobs and industries that I know nothing about (big PR agency account executive? Whaaa?!!) trying to find out about salaries, corporate culture, qualities that employers are searching for, etc. This takes up time, but I feel like I've learned so much. Even if I never become an account executive at a PR firm or someone who specializes in social media, at least I KNOW what they do. That's knowledge is empowering to me.

6. I make sure that my home looks somewhat presentable - Are you seeing a theme here?

Yep. That's it for now. At some point I hope that what I should be doing and what I actually am doing will actually mesh. I try to remind myself that I've only been doing this for a month, but then that kinda reminds me of the fact that "DAMN! I've been doing this for a month!"

Is there anything that I should be doing that I am not currently? What are other strategies, tasks, projects or books would you recommend for me?

Neither Here Nor There

One of the hardest things about working through this career change/transition is trying to figure out my place in the work world. I was very lucky last time around to have my former boss see some type of potential in me when she hired me. That's how I ended up finding a job in something that I had never done before. I came in at a level that was appropriate for me. While definitely a reduction in pay there wasn't such a big one in terms of the level of the job itself.

I've been wondering how to deal with this issue of where I fit in again. I don't feel so inclined to start a job requiring me to start from scratch, but I also know that I don't have experience in a whole lotta not much else. I know that I've got a lot to offer, but I'm just not sure who would be interested in me and where they'd want want me to fit into their organization.

The idea of working my way up from the bottom doesn't really appeal to me. I feel like I've paid my dues already. Who wants to pay dues in their 30's? I've already made stacks and stacks of copies, answered someone else's phone, lugged heavy boxes, alphabetized the randomest documents (I've also cleaned bathrooms and served cafeteria food. Those were...fun). You name, and I've done it. The idea of going to that place again makes me want to cringe. Perhapsbeing a housewife wouldn't be a bad thing after all? Another big red flag for me: Who wants to pay dues at the same time as starting a family (No, Jim and I are not there yet; but hey, it won't be too far down the pike. That's for another post.)?

Now by saying this, does that demonstrate that I really don't WANT to make the changes in my career that I really need? Am I too LAZY or too much of a prima donna to want to work my way to the top? I read this story last week about a man who worked his way up from the mail room at 65 and retired at 85. At 85, I want to be on a beach sipping some kind of tropical juice, watching my grankids play, and hopefully still wearing a bikini (dare to dream, right?). Is this the way that my career transition has to happen this time around?

I'd love to hear stories about people who have started all over career wise in their 30's and 40's, and how it's worked out for them. Do you know anyone like this?